Witches Haven

Letters to the Baba

Some words from the Baba:

Baba has been very busy with life and family. So sorry to readers. Have many, many e-mails that need answer.

Dear Baba

My son and his new wife are having problems. They fight all the time and when I try to tell them what the problems are? They get mad at me! I am only trying to help. What can I do to make them understand I just want to help!

Dilemma in Dallas


Dear Dilemma (that really your name??)

Being good mother and mother-in-law is tough job, ok. Must know when to speak and when to bite on tongue. Best thing? Don't speak. Even when asked by couple, keep words short. Do not interfere in lives of married dity - children. Know when to hug both and when to keep arms at side. Not your business, dorohyy. These are grown up people. Married people. They are needing to learn how to be couple. If they don't learn, then should not be married. Marriage is tough job. Need strong people with ability to compromise. No compromise? No marriage.

Cry your tears at home, in your house, not in their house. Never, never interfere in marriage of children, will make for unhappy life. No winning.

Dear Baba

My family is from Ukraine and I would like to trace them down but all the information I find is in Ukrainian and some of it isn't online. I can't afford to go to Ukraine to track my family down. Do you know what I could do?

Katya in Kansas


Dear Katya

Bless you for looking for family. Roots are important to healthy family tree. Baba suggest you go to Ukrainian site and lookink for someone from area of family. Make penpal with them. Ukrainian peoples are very proud. They love to tell about friends, family and country.
University in Kiev is good place to find peoples to help you.

Important to remember that many families disappeared when evil man - Stalin tried to destroy country. All families. All information was put in fire and destroyed. Big criminal this man. He roasts in communist hell Baba hopes. Many families disappear. No tracing.

Baba wish you well in search and write her, tellink of journey to find roots.

Dear Baba

I just received my son's report card and he's failing! He doesn't do his homework, just sits on his computer playing games and going on this Facebook thing. This is his first year of high school and I'm afraid this is a trend. What can I do to motivate him?

Melissa in Montreal

Dear Melissa

Vat the matter with you??? Oh Baba, help me, help me!!! Son is not doing homeverk, sitting on butt, playink on computer. Vat's the matter with you? You are parent. Boss, not good friend. Turn off computer. Delete Facebook account thing. Stand up and be parent.
No computer. No stupid games. Marks go up or computer gets put in box, in cellar. You call teachers and make them tell you homework every day. They have e-mail. They have few seconds required and if they don't? You go to principal. Make son do homework in kitchen, where you can watch him. He is child. Not grown up. Baba thinks that maybe son can't even spell responsibility, no vay he knows what it meanink. Your job is to teach him.

You in Montreal. First year of high school making son 13 years old? You let 13 years old rule household? Maybe you better go back to school and learnink what a parent is to be.

Shame on you! You ruining son's life by being chicken without head.

Dear Baba

I am so depressed. Here it is, almost Christmas and we have no money for gifts. My kids want this WII system but there is no way we can afford a gift like that. My husband has been laid off of his job and my company closed as well. We have our mortgage, the bills and we are just keeping our head above water. We have had to cut back on everything. No movies or going out to eat. We buy a lot of hamburger and whatever food is on sale.

This is going to be a very black Christmas for us. What did you do to make Christmas special in your country?

Down in the Dumps in Downsview

Dear Down

Vat ve did? Ve did not have the big stores to buy silly things. Ve make all gifts on own. Ahhh, ve cook and ve cook and ve bake and ve bake. The mens go out and creating beautiful things from wood. These things we give? They were love gifts. So bad that this season of the Holy Child, the season of the new sun is big monies and not much love.

This is time for childrens to learn good lesson. Money is not life. Big shining gifts don't meanink love. Love is inside of all and don't cost money, never running out of stock either. A gift from the kitchen is better and finer than gift from the Valmart or the Future Shopping. Making season good is the job of mother and father. Decorate tree, make popcorn string for birds. Sing the Christmas songs from your childhood.

Making candies and putting in box you find in dollar store or in cupboard. Cookies and cakes. Make book for each child - telling them what they are meaning to you. Putting photographs and maybe teachink each kid new craft to learn?

Baba is much liking dollar stores. So many little baubles for little money.

If children are not happy? This is lesson for mother and father. Maybe teaching of values has been forgotten? This give you something to think about instead of worry. Jobs will come but lessons must be learned first.

Srozhdestvom Kristovym!

Dear Baba

I am at my wit's end with my daughter. She has started high school and the change in her has been terrifying. She has become rude and defiant. She doesn't respect curfew, won't do her chores and locks herself in her room for hours at a time where she is on the computer for hours. She wears her IPod to the dinner table and refuses to take it off. She will leave the table and not eat her dinner until we are all finished.

She is demanding that we buy her clothes that are totally inappropriate for a girl of 14. I'm so embarrassed to be seen with her. She looks like a tramp.

Help us Baba. She is ruining the family!

Distraught in Dollard


You are joking with the old woman, ni? Vat? Don't you read other letters to Baba; 14 year old donka is ruining family? Baba thinks maybe family is in trouble before donka starts to act like tramp. 14 is little old to be changink for you but there is still hope, Baba is believing. It will be hard path to take but if mother and father vant to save donka, is vorth the vork.

Rude. Okay. You accepting the rude? Ni. You send donka to room and tell her to think about how to speak with people. But first? You take out computer from room.

Vat is wrong with you? You don't read papers? You don't hear news? Computer in room of child is like opening front door and leavink open for all the bad peoples out there with invitation to come on in and make to home.

Lock on door? In your house? Stupid, stupid womans. Have father take lock off door, this is dangerous and stupid. When she payink the bank for your house, then she have lock on door.

She is wearink this IPod to table? Again, Baba must ask, vat is wrong with you? Vat is wrong with father? You take IPod avay. If donka kick up the dust? You throw it avay.
What you mean, she finish dinner when everyone is gone? You take plate and you feed to dog or cat. Or you put out in garden to feed plants. She not want to eat without IPod? Then she don't eat.

Donka is demanding you buy clothes you don't like? Who is money, here? You work for money, ni? That is your money. She vant to dress like woman on street corner, she buy her own clothink.

Curfew is harder. Baba has hard time understanding curfew. Dark Lillith had to explain. In Baba's house there is no curfew because no need. Dity had brains between ears and know trouble will follow if they walk through door late.

If daughter is not home at curfew? You go get her. You get in car, you drive to where she is and in front of friends, you bring her home. You do this a few times and she vill be home.

If not? You are needing more help than Baba can give. Daughter did not change. She knows rules in house can be broken and no troubles will come. You have long road and need much help.

Baba is sad for you but you put the wheat in the field and leave it to the wild. Now you have to go and fix the field when wheat has already raised its head above ground.

Drop the Baba a line if you have a question for her.
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